9:24 p.m.

i only have one thing to say (ok if you know me that is an utter and complete lie.) regardless, i only have one important thing to say. if you ever have the urge to express the feeling of hopelessness, futility, etc., please say it using the following expression: "i have about the chance of a popsicle on the sunward side of mercury of ____*(ur little dilemma here)*. yes. wow that is truly a direct quote, and not uttered by one of the many random freaks i kno, but from the scholarly and educated authors of the hspa english tests. possible conspiracy to get the nation to use that wonderful phrase? the world may never know. however i dont feel that they would need help in promoting that one...

oh yes i have another request. if you ever have the urge to exclaim something in a burst of realization, do not yell,"i get it!" . ew. the boringness consumes me. please state with utmost fervor: "i successfully made it through the logjam in the river to catch this ride on your driftwood to pick up what you were throwing down!!" yess...now that is beauty at its greatest...

ok so the tendency towards criminal activity has considerably increased, and (gasp) its all due to those i admire. how terrible; noble examples lead to shameful corruption:

tuesday. the orthodontists office. the people eyed me suspiciously as i entered as if they could smell the criminal tendencies just wafting off of me (or else i just smelled funky). i stalked in stealthily. eying the magazine rack i found a suitable issue, a recent one, one with a probable chance of containing olympic coverage. opening the magazine, i found that my convictions were correct (as usual) and i smiled with conniving glee. casually flipping through (as to not attract unwanted attention) i encountered a great page. ohno and bode side by side. knowing that no other facility i attend would contain the magazine, i knew i only had one chance. time was running out. i stealthily flipped a couple pages, and tried to rip out the coveted page. but alas! i was ripping from the wrong side. looking at the clock i began to panic. hastily i flipped in the other direction and tried to extract it. joy it was working. i mean i successfully made it through the logjam in the river to catch this ride on the driftwood to pick up what the magazine's craftiness was throwing down. i slipped my hand in, quietly tore the page, craftily folded the page several times, and snuck it, unbeknowst to the rest of the room, into my jacket pocket. mission completed!

oh the hideous illicitness i partake in. that was almost as bad as the asparagus stealing from the guggenheim. but lets save that one for another day...

for esther: "it looked at me with a pair of big, soulful eyes and said sorrowfully, 'yeep?'"

for me: "we slogged (is that even a word??) along, with me concentrating so hard that i was afraid of spraining a convolution".

courtesy of the bulk of quotes today from the new jersey high school proficiency assessment fall 2001 test booklet about the six-legged svengali. oh the rapture.

babblin retox - 2004-12-28
thats jersey for you biiiatch - 2004-12-28
i <3 chubby christmas trees - 2003-12-05
peeling (oranges) - 2003-11-20
the strange but true colors of summer liz - 2003-07-29

drops of february

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